I joined the Marine Corps because I knew I needed to grow up before I went to college. That, and I, like any Marine, felt the need to prove some degree of worthiness to fit in with the boys. I was fascinated with the idea of "leadership" and I thought the Marines would help teach me about that. Furthermore, I loved the element of adventure and "the unfamiliar" to which the military experience would expose me.

I was a good Marine. I advanced through the ranks quickly and constantly kept my attention on how even the things I abhorred could teach me valuable lessons. In 2004 I was sent to Iraq. I went despite my knowledge that it was a war justified with lies. I remember deliberating about the option of running away from the Marine Corps at that time and feeling not only the utter impracticality of leaving Okinawa, Japan without a passport and without the consent of my command, but also the inner fear of destining myself to a lifetime of committments left unfulfilled. "If I can't make it through four years of this contract with the military, my first endeavor as an "adult," how can I expect myself to overcome the debt of shame, guilt, inadequacy and fear I will incur"

I graduated at the top of my class in Marine Corps Communication Electronics School despite my complete unfamilarity with computers and lack of passion for the Information Technology field. In Iraq, however, I was occasionally asked to fufill other roles. When I was given assigments such as escorting a convoy or being an overwatch sniper hidden along a highway, I was exhilirated. The adrenaline was the most potent drug I had to help me cope with an experience I thought was otherwise extremely boring and morally disgraceful. Even worse though, I felt completely horrible for allowing myself to experience a "thrill" at the expense of the Iraqi people everytime the danger of a situation induced the naive romance with which our culture had taught me to view war. I felt the need, even though I deeply opposed the war, to return home with some experience of "glory" that would earn me a seat at the table of honor as a legitimate warrior. The experience of glory, which I truly knew I would regret should it occur, never emerged, and I was releived yet ashamed.

I returned home extremely happy to be alive and unscarred by my experience. In fact, I was probably healthier when i returned as a result of my determination to use the "time in prison" to focus on what kind of man I wanted to be. My last year in the Marine Corps I was stationed in Quantico, Virginia. This assignment allowed me more time and resources to emerse myself in the political environment that instigated and perpetuated the war with which I had grown increasingly disgusted. In 2006 I co-founded a campaign of service members who called upon congress to cease the funding to the occupation of Iraq. (The Appeal for Redress) I was a Sergeant on Active Duty at the time. It was nerve racking. I thought I was sacrficing my college education, any future employment and possibly even risking time in jail to make such a public stand. But I thought that if the world was going to stand up to injustice, it would require a social movement with broad particiaption ignited, perhaps, by a spark of courage from people who were in positions like the one I found myself in.

I was thrust into a world I didn't know existed. I went from being a young man who wanted to be happy, successful and helpful but was considerably troubled by the growing perils of a world determined to destroy itself with war, consumerism and apathy, to all of a sudden in a situation where I thought I could help to make a difference in one of the most important issues of my time on this planet: The illegal occupation of Iraq. Before I had time to think I was on CNN, Keith Olberman, 60 Minutes by night, and sitting in the closet the Marine Corps stuffed me in by day reading Chomsky, Che Guevera and Howard Zinn by day.

It wasn't long before I came into contact with Kelly Dougherty, Jose Vasquez, Steve Mortillo, Matt Howard, Camilo Mejia, Geoff Millard, Drew Cameron and the young organization Iraq Veterans Against the War. I was thoroughly impressed and inspired by these people I was proud to call my peers. They were articulate, thoughtful and passionate about making a difference. I was intoxicated and threw myself into activism for three years.

The common conception was that we needed to build a social movement like the ones during the 60's. That was the only force strong enough to end the war... at least that's what I thought at the time. But it did seem supported by historical trends of social movements arising to progress humanity during times of injustice. (think civil rights, labor rights, or women's suffrage)

The American people didn't seem very eager to combust into a vibrant social movement though. I was discouraged and felt pretty powerless. People generally knew that the war was a travesty, but getting people to part with their life routines was not something I had the ability to do. For the most part, every person I looked at with activist's eyes immediately received a judgment. They were either disgracefully ignorant of what I deemed to be urgent and important, shamefully unconcerned, willing to accept powerlessness or just plain old "bought off" or "sold out" to the luxury of living under the umbrella of the imperial bully.

I noticed that my sense of excitmeent with activism was wearing off. I recognized that it was withering my soul to judge people so continually. I also recognized that I never changed people by judging them. At the same time I was becoming more and more willing to accept more and more radical information explaining why the world seemed so controlled by such absurd tendencies (war and greed). At first it was refreshing to be exposed to socialism and marxism, because a thorough and unrelenting critique of capitalism, the very (often unquestioned) foundation of our society seemed extremely appropriate to a young man seeking answers for why our world functioned so insanely. Socialism, and finally all "isms," eventually revealed their own dogmatic and insane beliefs which never seemed flexible enough to deal with an evolving world. It occurred to me that all ideologies can and do support their own valid points as well as their nightmares, but the common thread of why a "system" worked or didn't work was that people were inhumane to each other. The problems, it seemed to me, were rooted in people, not the conditions, obviously it followed then that changing the surface level conditions without addressing the root seemed senseless.

Throughout, I was always open minded enough to entertain even the wildest conspiracy theories. This facet of my personalty was extremely influential as it taught me the ability to listen ideas, no matter how alien to what I had once viewed as conventional or "safe', with a calm willingness to accept truth no matter how much it threatened what I previously believed.

This ties directly into my utter fascination with the laws of attraction and the ancient spiritual ideas that teach that what we percieve with the five senses is not all that exists. It was very difficult for me at first to accept anything other than what could be verified scientifically. Then I stumbled upon spiritual philosophers who used quantum physics to illuminate that spirituality and science are really trying to label and explain the same truth. During the last year I have taken my fascination with where the world of mystical spirituality and world power conspiracy theories meet from a mere insatiable curiousity to a life governing thought system.

I am writing this new autobiography the day after I finished a cross-continent, summer long bicycle journey. The lessons I have accumulated through it all leave me with a conviction that the infinite, all encompassing energy of love is the only reality and all else is an illusion derived from the insane belief that we are separate from each other.

What does that mean? To me it means that fear and isolation are responsbile for the world I so desperately wanted to change. And the remedy is forgiveness, the unconditional variety. Listening with and to the messages from our heart's and viewing our experiences with each other as experiences, not primarily of our five senses, but of our common language -the energy of our most loving and joyous emotions- is how I guide my life.

I think we are unlimited beings when we acknowledge each other with love. So, that's a brief story of how I ended up with a thought system radically different and many times more rewarding than the one's I started with.

In short, I've come a long way, released a lot of fear and live each day with these basic lessons in mind:

1: The only time that exists is now, and it is the only time in which I can experience reality and happiness

2. To have, give all to all. (The only thing that I have to give is thoughts (Much more importantly feelings) of love)

3. To learn peace Teach Peace

4. I will always find what I look for, I will aways look for what I value therefore I choose to value ONLY giving love, to all, unconditionally

5. I am worthy of constant effort and so are all of my brothers and sisters

6. I need not understand how to forgive or love or give, my willingness alone is enough.

Peace Brothers and Sisters

Liam served as a Communications Electronics Specialist in the Marine Corps from January 2003 to January 2007. While enlisted he was deployed to Iraq, Kuwait, Thailand, Okinawa, Japan, and Korea. During his last year in the Marines, Sergeant Madden co-founded the Appeal for Redress, a campaign of service members demanding that congress halt the war in Iraq.

Liam is currently a junior attending Northeastern University.